Zombie Apocalypse Shelter = Best Mom Ever

Apocalypse Shelter

The kids call it their zombie apocalypse shelter, but really it's just an awesome hideout that any kid would love.  

Except a child that suffers with claustrophobia.

That kid would not love this shelter.

We have a 100yr old house that has odd shaped closets.  I've strung Christmas lights in each of their closets with carpets, pillows, etc.  A different closet has a dollhouse, sheepskin rugs and a full mirror (my dream closet when I was a little girl).   I'm a neat freak but I also think kids should be allowed to make a mess - so if they have a play space that I don't have to look at it's a win-win.  They don't often play IN their closet, but they can chuck everything in before I come up to tuck them in for the night and that's fine by me.  

Here's two of my boys in their closet - we cleaned it out and removed a bookshelf I had installed at the end.  

My Dad built this cupboard for my Mom a million years ago.  Well, at least 30 years ago.  

I love having pieces that are family pieces in the house, but this is more of a utility cupboard.  Not an antique, not fancy, painted fire engine red.... you get the idea.

Monty bought a tool kit from the 1980s at 

    Bibles For Missions (it was still in its packaging) and the tools    are actually functioning tools.  I let him use his new 

(very sharp) saw to cut the hole out.  

There are a lot of studies on why allowing your children to take risks is good for them.  

My children learn to use knives and tools that are considered dangerous.  

Letting my 8 and 5 year old use a functioning hand saw was not only fun, but they definitely appreciated how much work it is to cut something by hand. 

Monty has cerebral palsy, and this was 

a great opportunity for him to work on his fine

 and gross motor skills.  

Success!  

After the boys were done cutting the hole I had them clean the mess on their own.  There were a lot of rough edges that needed cleaning and the floor needed a good sweep.  

The inside of the cupboard also had a lot of sawdust that needed cleaning.  

I believe I refilled my coffee while they fought over who was doing the most work.  

And here it is in the closet!  This didn't almost take out a wall, or cause endless amounts of grief and possibly swearing.  

This also didn't need to be reassembled IN the closet so it would fit. 

I was never good in math, and I clearly need to spend more time on angles.  

While the cupboard fits nicely in the closet - it did not have enough space to turn once I had it in there.  

I beat the crap out of the walls trying to fit it in with brute force - but eventually gave up and took it apart to reassemble once in place.  If it wasn't a closet I wouldn't have let my walls take such a beating, but after all the baskets went back in it isn't noticeable. 

When I finally got it in,  the boys were cheering for me, praising my strength and resilience and were even more grateful for the time I was spending helping them create their shelter. 

It's always good to stock up on 

My-Mom-Is-Awesome-Points

The result is fantastic!  Even their Dad couldn't find them until they revealed themselves with giggling. 

They've assured us we are not welcome in their shelter if there really is a zombie apocalypse but that they will survive just fine without us. 

I believe them.  On both counts.   

They brought a reading lamp, two pillows and a blanket back there and have fit 3 stinky boys in there at a time.  With lego.  

Whether or not it's used as a real shelter or just a quiet space to read Moby Dick for the 4th time, 

it's a great little place to encourage creativity, imagination and plain old fun.  

Have a weird closet?  Try turning it into a play closet and send me a pic!

Bonus Story

If anyone actually reads these bonus stories, you need to tell me!  I try to keep my posts as short as I can because I imagine no one wants to actually read the whole thing, but some of you make it to the bottom and I want to know who you are!  Anyways.... to the story.

When I was in grade 5, my teacher stood at the front of the class explaining each novel available to us for our novel study.  There were at least half a dozen options, but I don't remember any of them except the one I chose.

The Diary of Anne Frank.

I remember the teacher describing the book, and when we were allowed to go to the front of the class to choose our novel I ran as fast as I could so I could get my copy before they were all gone.

I thought every kid in that class would be fighting over the few copies available.  

I was the only one who chose that book.

I still can't figure out why no one else chose it, but I know that they missed out.  Big time. 

Ever since reading it I can't read about or look at a picture of a secret wall, or hideaway without thinking of Anne Frank, her family or the other Jews hiding for their safety.  

For more on Anne Frank, visit the official website 

If you'd like more inspiration to build your own secret hideaway, have a look at this awesome collection of hidden doors/rooms.  

Kale Chips

I can't explain why total strangers ask for my nutritional advice, but they do.  

All the time.

It mostly happens near the kale.  

Everyone wants to get in on the kale craze but a lot of people aren't sure how to incorporate this 

"superfood" into their lives.  

I tell them that I drink kale (usually baby kale), use it in fresh salads, bake with it instead of spinach and my favourite favourite favourite....

Kale Chips

First try.

I LOVE this picture because while this was her reaction, she actually likes them. She just wasn't expecting the texture/taste. Any time I make a batch she's one of the littles mowing down with me.

You don't really need a recipe to make kale chips, but a little instruction can be helpful. I will pass along my trials and errors and hopefully you won't have to go through them.

Buying Kale

There are quite a few different kinds of kale, so don't be intimidated when you see it at the store. I haven't found a big difference in taste, and they are all equally simple to prepare - so pick whichever one strikes your fancy. Buy all of them and try each one for yourself! Kale is the same as any other fresh veg: you want to avoid brown spots, limp leaves and rubbery feeling plants. Fresh kale will be found in the wet aisle of the grocery store, where you get sprayed if you hang out singing show tunes for too long. Or whistling them - the sprayer doesn't discriminate.

This is my only little person who just doesn't love kale chips. He's tried them with salt, nutritional yeast, sprayed with soy sauce, and with Oh She Glow's "All Dressed" recipe and just can't get into them. Cutting the kale is great occupational therapy for his hands though, so he still helps me make them.

Prepping Kale
I like to prep veggies as soon as I get them home so they are more convenient to eat. I especially like prepping kale in advance so it has a good chance to dry out before baking. Prepping is simple. Remove leaves from stem (the stem is like a tree twig it's so chewy) and cut or tear into small pieces. I'd say a 2 inch square, but sometimes the pieces are smaller because of the shape of the kale. If you have a salad spinner - rinse the kale and spin it. I use a colander and rinse the kale and toss it in the colander over the sink to drain excess liquid. Dump kale onto clean dishtowel and roll up. You can leave the kale in the fridge like this for a few days and it will stay fresh and crisp. Personally, when I know there is kale in the fridge it never lasts a few days - I just can't wait to eat it.

Bake those chips

Low and slow is how you want to bake these, so preheat your oven to 300. What I love about kale chips is that you really only need 1tsp (2 TOPS) of oil to coat a whole head of kale. Put the clean and dry kale in a big bowl and add 1tsp of your favourite oil. I am addicted to nut oils and have been using walnut - but anything will do: avocado, olive, coconut - use what you've got. You'll need to put your hands in the bowl to really get the leaves coated. I tried tossing it a few times but it really just doesn't get the job done. Stick your hands in - it's just oil.

Once the leaves are all coated, lay them on a cookie sheet lined with parchment paper. It may seem like a pain in the tooshie - but use two cookie sheets and give those little pieces of kale lots of space. You don't want them layered on top of each other or you'll have soggy or burnt chips and that's not tasty. After the kale is spread out evenly on the cookie trays pop into the oven for 15 minutes, rotate the pans and stick in for another 10 (25 minutes total). I've found the curlier kale can take up to 35 minutes - so when you take it out of the oven just quickly eat a piece to see if it's dried out or not. It cools almost instantly so there is no mouth burning possibilities. If it's not quite dry pop back in the oven and keep a close eye on it, putting back in for 2 minute increments until perfect.

Once the chips are done baking, let them cool for a minute or two on the tray. This is when I like to season mine. I have tried many kale chip recipes but my favourite is plain old salt. When the chips are cool, pour into a bowl and I dare you not to eat every last bit. If you have leftovers put them in an airtight container and eat within 2 days. Seriously though, who has leftovers?

These two little people are equally as addicted to kale chips as I am. I have to bake 3-4 heads of kale to satisfy the family. 

I also just love the super serious face I'm getting in the top pic. He puts food in the whirly pop, mixes it up and eats it afterward. I swear he does it so it's like he's made it and not me. He's bossy like that.

Full Disclosure

When I first tried kale chips I thought "what a rip off!" They were not chips. They were crunchy pieces of salad with salt on them. I think the word "chips" is what throws a lot of newbies off. I tried a handful (I'm an all or nothing girl) and my face mimicked the face of my daughter in the above picture - but as soon as I was done eating that first handful I just had to have more. It's true. Soon enough the whole bowl was gone and I had eaten an entire head of kale. I'm sure pigging out on anything isn't really healthy, but I don't ever feel bad when I've pigged out on a monstrous amount of kale. So... try it, I know you'll love it - just don't expect it to be a chip replacement.

If you're looking for more tips on kale chips, I found this article to be really helpful. Happy Baking!

8 1/2 Tips for Raising Creative Kids

 I saw this blog post shared a few times on my Facebook and it was titled "20 Ways to Keep Toddlers Busy".  I clicked on it because I have a toddler who makes schooling the older ones IMPOSSIBLE!   Some of the suggestions were decent, although I haven't tried any.  Nothing seems to keep my youngest happier than the food processor or blender.   What shocked me and actually made me sad was this suggestion: "Tape off a section of the floor for them to sit in. Also tape a spot where you place a bucket of toys. Have them stay in the taped off section for play time. This may take some training, so start off trying this for a few minutes at a time." The taped off section looks like it's 

3ft X 4ft, but I'm being honest when I say it could be smaller.  I'm not sure what this world has come to when we tape off sections on a floor for our children to be "trained" to stay in - but that's NOT childhood, and that's not what creates a healthy mind & body.  My toddlers are wonderful creative little people, and even when they are being horrific I still couldn't imagine "training" them to stay still.  Yikes!  I'm not trying to bash this blog (although it seems that's what I'm doing), but why bother having kids if you aren't going to enjoy the hee-haw out of them?  Have fun, be light, and love your creative little people like no one else can!

One of our creative breakfasts!  I give the kids a heap of fresh fruit on a plate and they arrange it on wooden skewers.  It's great occupational therapy for my son with cerebral palsy, and my kindergarten aged littles LOVE making patterns and designs with the fruit.  

8 1/2 Tips for Raising Creative Kids

1. Turn off the tv (and other electronic devices).  Make sure they know it's not an option until a set time.  Ours is right after lunch for 40 minutes (I feel that's too long and we skip it a lot), and one before bed - usually 40 minutes again, but sometimes I let them watch a full movie which can be over an hour.  It depends on how much laundry I'm folding.  

2.  Let them be bored!  Unless your house is nothing but four walls - they won't be "bored" for long.  When buying toys for your little ones - try to find ones that demand creativity.  Toys that don't move on their own, have flashy lights and songs, and do all the thinking for them.  If you hate the thought of glue and construction paper all over your house - have a craft bag or box and designated area for them to do arts in.  Sometimes the two worlds overlap… like when the boys made guns out of construction paper and chased each other around the house, but that didn't make too big of a mess.  I also like to send my kids outside and let them know they won’t be coming in for a certain amount of time (usually a 2 hour minimum).  Play.  Climb.  Fight.  Get filthy.  Eat worms.  Be kids.  

3. Require more.  Little people have great ideas if you give them the chance to need to be resourceful.  All my children have chores - and their creativity in executing them is astounding at times.  Yes, sometimes it leads to me finding things out of place - like a certain someone's book collection under the bear claw tub - but, really, it was a pretty good idea (just don't tell him that).  The point is, if you don't ask your children to do anything challenging they won't need to creatively problem solve.  This doesn’t just mean assigning chores - it means, let them figure stuff out!  You don’t have to read their instruction manual and put their Lego together perfectly.  Let them make a mess of it, or read the manual and do it perfectly.  The point is, let THEM.  

4. Be an example!  Don't be afraid for your kids to catch you boogieing down in the kitchen when a great song comes on the radio, (or Songza these days).  You'll also have to turn off the tv, allow yourself to "be bored" (i.e. put down the cell!), and find ways to incorporate creativity into your every day life.  A few of my personal rules are:  1.  No “grown up” tv until everyone is in bed, not even the news.  2. “Forget” your cell.  A lot.  Don’t take it on walks.  Don’t take it for hikes.  Definitely forget it on dates or special trips.  I know you hate people who look at their screens when you’re talking to them - don’t do it to your kids.  3. Remember who you love and treat them accordingly.  Don’t put on nice faces for strangers and let your kids get the ugliest version of you.  Let your kids get the fun, loving, patient, generous self and if there’s nothing left - the strangers, coworkers, and acquaintances can suffer - not your kids.  The thing is, if you live a true life with your children and don’t “fake it” when you’re out, you will have more than enough happiness to share with non-family.  Trust me.  Love and happiness multiply.

5. Encourage, compliment and criticize (constructively).  My son loves to sit and plunk at the piano.  He creates songs from his head that are beautiful and are actually acoustically pleasing.  I compliment his playing, but also encourage him to do his scales, try new songs, and to try to create different sounding songs.  Creativity doesn't have to be expressed in the arts.  My 5 year old is the most imaginative kid I have ever met.  He wears costumes for days.  Not costumes you'd find in a store or on tv either.  Costumes he's created, and corresponds with the superhero (or super villain) he's also dreamt up.  He will tell me so many details (too many details) about his character's home, family, motives, powers, weaknesses, etc. and it's all from HIM.  If he creates a feature that doesn't quite make sense, I challenge him on it.  Sometimes he comes up with a good explanation but other times, my asking questions helps him see that it doesn't work and he needs to figure something else out.  Our culture seems to praise kids without adding the constructive criticism part.  Yes, your child did a great job - but there is always room for improvement, and let them know that… gently. 

6. Unschedule.  Just do it.  Let your kids find THEIR own interests.  Your child may love math, chess, dancing, reading - but you will never know if you let them waste their youth on video games, YTV and schedule every last minute of their day.  Children join and quit activities and parents shell out hundreds of dollars hoping their child will find their niche.  Stop signing them up for stuff, give them actual FREE time (for a long time too) and see what they naturally like and are good at.  

PS - Don't make being a professional, or a star the objective.  Just because your son started hockey doesn't mean his goal should be to play in the NHL.  Your daughter can sing, that's great - but being famous should never be the goal.  You get the picture - just let your children be children for goodness' sake and stop making money and fame the goal for everything!

7. They aren't you.  I have never seen a kid in public wearing something ridiculous and thought the parent was to blame.  If your child is wearing a costume mid-June - AWESOME!  And way to go for not making them wear what YOU think is trendy and acceptable.  Obviously we have to draw lines at certain times, but your child is not YOU.  Kids look like mini adults most of the time, but where is the fun in that?  I can't hang out with my friends with a fake sword shoved down a belt that isn't even looped in to pants - but my kids can.  This carefree part of life is so short.  Messy hair, mismatched clothes, the same backpack for a few years..... let them decide, creatively, for themselves, how they want to present themselves.  Personally, I spent a good year or more wearing the SAME white sweatshirt with pink and purple triangles and pandas on the front.  I loved that sweatshirt.  It made me feel empowered because I loved pandas and wanted the world to know.  Our kids reflect us - they do, you can hear it in the way the talk to others or how they tackle goals, but they aren't mini versions of us.  Let your kid wear their panda sweatshirt.  

8. Just say no to branding.  Seriously!  What the heck are we doing plastering a kids room in Winnie the Pooh or Tinkerbell before they're even born?  We have lost our ever-loving minds.  Globally, we are facing issues with our youth and their feelings of entitlement.  What could make someone feel more entitled than attaching their entire personality to a BRAND!?!  This isn't just about entitlement - it's about developing a personality that is authentic.  Cornering our young people into the mainstream personality types are not only stifling their creativity, but it's creating masses of depressed and drugged children.  Yes, trends won't last forever BUT the entitlement to "things" just changes brands, it doesn't go away once you've embedded it.   I've seen kid after kid have their every whim indulged based on the newest trend.  Hannah Montana and Justin Bieber bed sheets didn't create themselves - WE created a demand for them.  Please, oh please just neutralize the branding and buy plain t-shirts* and plain sheets and backpacks without a TM.   

1/2.  STOP LISTENING TO OTHER PEOPLE.  Yes, I know how ironic that is.  What I really mean is stop listening to the wrong people.  Every family is different.  Something that works for my family won’t always work for yours.  If you have someone telling you what you “should” be doing with or for your children and it does not sit well with you, or you don’t want it for your child - just don’t do it.  For a family to be healthy, it needs to work for the family -  not for everyone outside of it.  If you don’t like condoning violence, don’t put your child in karate just because all your friend’s kids are.  If you hated piano lessons more than ANYTHING don’t enrol your child just because your parents insist you continue the tradition of music.  Keep them home, put them in after school activities, do what works for your family - BUT, and this is a big but (haha, big butt)…. it needs to be right for you AND your child.  I hear/read parents supporting other parents by spitting out the painfully common phrase “do what's best for you” or "do what works for you".  Well, that’s why we have so many darned issues folks.  You had kids, and while they shouldn’t rule the roost they certainly can’t be ignored.  Do what’s best for your whole family - parents AND children.  

This isn't one of the tips, but we need to really focus on WHO we are raising.  Are you raising a consumer?  Someone who gets every new trendy thing?  Are you raising a competitor?  Someone who will put others down so he can be the very best?  Are you raising someone who feels unimportant and small?  Someone who has never had anyone have a REAL relationship with them?  Yup, there are lots of days where we parents just try to eek by and make it to the next day, and that might include hilarious amounts of extra iPad time - but every day can't be like that.  

We have to invest in these people we brought into this world.  Invest time and relationship.  

Do it.  Just do it. 

 Or don't. 

 Get angry and write a mean response to my stupidly innocent blog post and waste precious time you could be hanging' with your littles.  

Oh man, that was a joke.  I hope you aren't writing angrily now.... 

PS All my kids are in bed.  So don't even try flipping that on me.  

Guess what?  That's all I've got.  

*I have definitely indulged my boys in second hand t-shirts when they are mental for something.  I justify it by saying I get it AFTER they've already liked something, but it's really the same thing as what I'm suggesting we stop doing.  I didn't say I was perfect, but I still stand by the principle.  I actually did stop buying any brands or logos on shirts (Mario, Superman, etc) a little over a year ago, and they haven't even noticed yet.*

My delightful husband and proofreader said I need to add an extra tip, so if you're still reading here's Ron's Bonus Tip: Yell at your kids.  A lot.  Having a healthy fear forces creativity.  The child needs to be creative for several survival reasons.  1. They can creatively dance around your intense mood swings so as not to disturb the dragon.  2. They are so miserable they create a fantasy life that is based entirely in the land of make believe.  3. Being afraid will encourage a quiet creativity that doesn't disturb the perfect life you had before all these little people started pooping, crying and making messes in your house 24 hours a day.  So.... don't forget the bonus tip; yell at your kids!

Poop Cookies

You are what you Eat!

Actually, that saying does ring true for a lot of people. 

Every time I sneak a Tunnock Snowball - standing face-to-wall in the corner of the kitchen, I look at the fluffy little treat and sadly think to myself "you are what you eat". 

It's basically marshmallow if you've never had one.  

Then I look at the snowball again and eat it quickly because I can hear tiny feet running towards me. 

I digress. 

 Today's recipe may have you scratching your head at my parenting sensibilities - but let me tell you something… we had so much fun.  

Making the cookies, laughing hysterically at what great poop shapes we could make, deciding what poop shape each of us should go with, deciding how to play the prank out, actually playing the prank out, and eating it still under the pretence that it was real poop.  Really - so much fun!  

The cookies taste great too, so it was a win-win-win.

My lovely boy found a practical joke book at the library (3 of them actually) and plotted how to use the pranks on his older sister.  

We agreed on one, and incorporated it into our "treat night".  

Poop Cookies

1/2 cup butter

1/2 cup sugar

2tbsp cocoa 

Preheat oven to 375

Melt butter, sugar and cocoa on medium heat until sugar is dissolved.  Set aside. 

1 egg
1/2 tsp vanilla
green food colouring
1/2 cup brown sugar (packed)
1 cup flour
1/2 cup oats
1 cup corn flakes, rice krispies, or other cereal (we used rice krispies)

Mix egg, vanilla and 5-8 drops of green food colouring.  Add the brown sugar to the eggs, and mix thoroughly.  Add 1/2 cup flour and mix.  Add cocoa/butter mixture, mix.  Add remaining 1/2 cup flour and make sure it's mixed thoroughly. Add the oats and cereal.  

Line a baking sheet with parchment and place cookies or logs (wink wink) two inches apart.  If your dough is quite warm or you do not want your cookie to spread - pop it in the fridge or freezer for 10-30 minutes before baking.  I did not do this.  The kids couldn't wait that long.  Bake 10-12 minutes.  If you want a truly convincing cookie, set the timer for the 9 minute mark - take the cookies out and with two heat proof spatulas (or butter knives) squish the edges in.  This will stop and repair any spreading the cookie did while baking and add cracks that make it more realistic.  The cracks are also helpful for sticking peanuts or candy corn in, if you are so inclined.  

I lined a baking tray with parchment paper and wrote each child's name on the sheet in pencil (except the older sister we were pranking).  I gave each child an ice cream scoop of batter to create their own "poo" shape and place on the baking tray under/on their name.  Scooping dough ensured everyone had the same amount of dough (no fighting) and labelling the tray meant we didn't have to try to remember the details of each poop for later identification.    

We had a few extra cookies that were in the house for 3 days and were still really fresh after that time.  Just pop any leftovers in a sealed container and you can have fresh poop for days!  

I think this would be a GREAT treat to send in a school lunch! 

Happy Baking!

If you're still reading, I have a funny little story to share.  As you can see, some of the cookies were eaten outside.  I was out with the kids for a while, but the youngest was fussy and we went in leaving the older ones to play.  After a short while my 3 year old daughter came to the back door saying she lost her cookie somewhere in the snow.  

Well, we have a dog.  A dog with similar sized poop. 

 The boys were buckled over with laughter as I begged her not to search for her cookie in the snow, and DEFINITELY not to eat any suspected cookies until I confirmed if it was indeed a cookie or not. 

 I guess this is a warning - if you make these, maybe get your kids to eat them somewhere your doggie doesn't do his business.  

Green Eggs & Ham

Most children love Dr.Seuss books, and my kids are no exception.  While reading Green Eggs & Ham, my 5yr old asked if green eggs were real and I said I would make him some.  

I think these would have turned out nicer as scrambled eggs.  They tasted GREAT, but I only made it into mini quiche because I already had the oven on.  Scrambled would have been just as nice and the colour would have been brighter.

For 12 mini crustless Quiche

-Chop and carmelize 1 onion and a few cloves of garlic until soft and brown.  I used coconut oil, but any oil or butter will do.

-Add 4 cups of loose baby spinach and keep covered on the heat until the leaves wilt and become dark green.  No liquid is needed, the spinach will weep out moisture during the heating process.  

-When onions, garlic and spinach cool - blend in a food processor with a few tablespoons of milk until it is as pureed as it can get

-Whisk puree and 7 eggs together in a large bowl

Cook as you please from this point on.  This could be an omelette, scrambled eggs, or go ahead with the rest of the recipe and make quiche....

Preheat oven to 375

I used parchment paper muffin cups (they don't stick to ANYTHING), and filled each paper half way with the egg mixture.  I then added a pinch of shredded cheese and continued to fill muffin cup to the 3/4 mark.  The eggs will expand while baking and look like a giant cupcake or muffin while hot, but will quickly shrink back down once out of the oven.  Bake for 20 minutes, and if you're a carnivore - serve with a nice slice of ham.  

So... what did the kids think?

With the exception of my egg-hater, they all LOVED it.  My 5yr old said it was just like the book: he didn't think he would like green eggs, but as soon as he tasted them he loved them and would eat them... in a box, with a fox, in a house, with a mouse, etc.

Do you have a creative way you like to add veggies to meals?  Share with me in the comments box or send an email and I will share with The Good Kind of Crazy readers.  Happy Baking!

The right way to do dishes

Yes, I know this showcases my insane need to control things - but as far as this house goes there is a wrong and right way to do dishes.  I talk to my children about their responsibility to the Earth and being  a mindful consumer.  Whether or not you believe in global warming, there is nothing wrong with teaching your children to use things responsibly - water included.  I teach my family that being grateful for clean water means using it with respect.

World Vision reports that Nearly 2,000 children under age 5 die each day from diarrheal diseases caused by unsafe drinking water and spread by lack of basic sanitation and hygiene. This is more than HIV and malaria combined.    

When people visit my house and clean the dishes after a meal, I usually grit my teeth and accept that they are trying to help - letting their kindness override the fact that they are running water, running water, running water.  If you care about conservation, or even just your water bill - here's how we do things around here.

Starting with a full sink, the dishes get scrubbed and set aside in the empty sink.  We have a utensil caddy we use to hold all the soapy utensils in the empty sink as well.  We are lucky enough to have a double sink.  If you don't have one, just use the counter for the soapy dishes.  When the sink that was full of dishes is empty, use the scrubby/sponge to clean the sink out.  Cleaning the sink after every round of dishes is important!  Rinse it and put the stopper back in.

All ready for part two.

Start by rinsing utensils and glasses/mugs.  Rinsing with hot water is key to clean dishes, so if your young'uns can't handle it, pick up some rubber gloves.   Once cups and utensils are rinsed, there is enough water in the sink to dip and rinse the plates and bowls.  Leave the rinse water in the sink.

This little man gets 25c for every chore he does around the house.  I'd say this was 25c well earned.

The sink has hot clean water for the next round of dishes to go in and barely any water was used.  

Other ways to teach your children to conserve:

- Use newspaper to clean windows and mirrors.  They will love the black ink that transfers to their hands

- Use cloths instead of paper towel.  We only use paper towel (recycled) for cleaning the toilet and everything else is a cleaning cloth that gets reused again and again

- Remind little ones water isn't for their amusement.  If you have a water lover, fill the bathroom sink once and let them slosh toys around in it.  When it's gone it's gone.  

- When washing hands and brushing teeth, the water only comes on at the beginning and the end - not the whole way through!

- Lights come on when it's dark only.  If someone isn't in the room, the light is off.  Most of my kids freak out when they find someone has left a light on in an unoccupied room. Brainwashed, haha.

- Talk about packaging.  Do we really need cookies that come in a box, and then are packaged again?  I can't believe how many things are individually wrapped, and then boxed/wrapped again.  Just make a batch of granola bars or cookies at home and save all the garbage!  

- Aim for a litterless lunch.  Fruits, veggies and sandwiches don't need packaging if you're sending tupperware.  The prepackaged stuff is usually junk, so try filling lunches with food that doesn't create garbage.  

- Compost.  Whether or not you have a garden to use it on, composting is a great way to eliminate sending things to a landfill.  My kids love collecting worms and putting them in the compost to "live a happy life".  

Taking steps to reduce the size of your environmental footprint isn't as taxing as it may seem.  Start small and slowly add to the positive steps you've taken.  If you already implement a lot of environmentally friendly practices, remember we can always improve.  Garbage and waste may seem like an insurmountable problem, but all we can do is be the change we want to see.  

You could also write a preachy blog about how to do dishes properly.  Haha.

Saving your Children's Artwork

I have a lot of little people in my house, and for now they are all young enough to adore me.  I get cards and pictures like you wouldn't believe.  I don't think children should feel like they are the centre of the world and all their art should be cherished as if drawn by Picasso himself, but they did make something they're proud of and probably shouldn't see it sitting in the recycling the next morning.  

I'm pretty honest with my kids.  Age appropriate honesty of course.  I don't like recycling their art without telling them that's what is going to happen, so if they're feeling attached to what they've made I take a picture with a digital camera and then recycle it.  They feel happy that their paper is going off to a plant to make more paper, and also feel like all their work wasn't for naught.  

This was a sign my son wanted me to take a pic of and post to facebook so he could "get work".  Is this one saved on the external hard drive?  You betcha.  The print says he will work for one week, for $5.00 - but that's only for people 45 and under, for "old" people it's free!  

I usually wait until our art table is crammed with paper (every four months or so), take 30-40 minutes and sort out all the artwork and take digital pictures of all the "special" pieces.  Computers have a lot of digital space these days, and if yours doesn't there are external hard drives and online storage like iCloud.  Your kids will get to "keep" their art, and you get a tidy art corner again!  

Primary Occupation? Dad.... and he works outside of the home.

Fathers often get pigeonholed into two categories. I hear/read complaints about men who spend no time in the home, need to "blow off steam" after work and spend weekend after weekend partying.  I also find that fathers who do not fit this bill, who are out pushing babies in strollers or playing at the park, are seen as "forced" to do this.  There is a vast middle ground, often overlooked.  Not all husbands who choose to stay home with their family in their free time are under the thumb of a controlling wife, or "helping" a Mom who just needs a break.  There are many fathers, who play a critical role in their children's lives - who are as much a parent as the Mom, or primary caregiver (please allow for alternate family scenarios here - two mommies, two daddies, one daddy, grandparents, etc).

Spurred by the recent article about how men need two nights out a week with their male friends to be healthy and happy, I (admittedly ironically) need to stand up for my husband and husbands just like him.  Perhaps this article is true for single men, but even for single men - I believe the benefits of joining other men in community service, such as building houses with Habitat for Humanity or working at a food bank or homeless shelter would be more fulfilling and lead to a "richer" life as the article puts it.  You can read the article here:  http://life.nationalpost.com/2013/10/22/men-need-to-meet-up-with-friends-for-a-brew-or-a-brawl-to-stay-healthy-u-k-study/

When our first child was born, my husband didn't freak out, but he also didn't get it.  Yes, he finally understood I was growing a person - someone who needed me to stop smoking, eat properly and take care of myself.  It wasn't just the annoyance of my incredibly sore back, my inability to party like we used to, he was here - a human child who needed love.  My husband took two weeks off of work, 11 days of which were spent in the NICU, and afterwards was back at life.  We were happy, but he still longed for what life was like pre-children. 

We bought a house, a minivan, welcomed 3 foster children into our home, and went from two single carefree people - to two parents of four with a mortgage and heaps of responsibility - all within two years.  We had parties from time to time, with friends from high school, and they were great.  They were so great.  Costumes, food, games, sometimes belt lashings (long story), and we felt young and "free" again.  

When our second child was born, my husband decided to take some of his parental leave.  Our foster children were (are) very high needs and it would have been very difficult to manage a newborn and their behaviour.  I believe this is where the shift happened for him.  What he thought would be three months of leisure, family time, visiting friends out of town, a few rounds of golf, etc. turned out to be incredibly hard work.  I had a c-section with my second child, had some complications afterward, and was off my feet for a while.  

He got it.

At first, all he got was how hard it is to run a well functioning house.  A house where the floors are swept, dishes are done, meals are made from scratch, and kids are happy (and usually dirty - the dirtiest things in the house!)  The first few weeks, he didn't understand how the house could continually transition from disaster to normal over and over again throughout the course of one day.  How laundry that was clean and put away went to unmanageable in a week.  How three bunches of bananas disappear in fifteen minutes.  While I appreciated him seeing firsthand how difficult staying at home can be, I truly cherish what he learned in his heart.

Family is where it's at.

After his 3 months were up, he was heartbroken.  Couldn't believe he had to leave his family and return to something he now felt was so meaningless and empty.  He loved (and still loves) his job.  He feels he's good at it, it challenges him and he loves his co-workers.  It just didn't compare.  The last week or so of his leave, he spent a great amount of time and effort trying to find ways to make money while staying home.  He felt sick to his stomach each time he remembered his time at home was running out.  

He didn't take any trips out of town to see his old buddies.  He played one round of golf.  He didn't have a single night out at a bar, or a pool hall, or to the movies.  He fulfilled none of the things he thought he would in his 3 months, but didn't have a single regret.  He did take long walks in the middle of the night, with our fussy newborn in a sling, to help settle him.  He did do 90% of the dishes to help ease my burden of cooking for so many people.  He did spend special "boys nights" with his sons - watching movies like Star Wars and bonding over sword fights and popcorn.   He spent almost every moment with his family, and still wanted more.  

We have had two more children since the birth of our second son, and his parental leave has grown longer with each child.  He took 8 months for the birth of our daughter, and 9 months for the birth of our last son.  Each time he had to return to work it was the same scene.  Tears and gut wrench at the thought of leaving his family.  

I understand there are more Fathers who can't take leave than can.  Their spouse works as well and only one can take leave, he's a single Dad, he can't afford living on less, etc.  The point of this is not to say that Fathers should take parental leave, or have to spend all their free time outside of work with their family.  The point is, when you love someone - absolutely love them - you want  to spend time with them.  

Spending time doesn't mean walking in the door and opening your laptop.  It doesn't mean reading the paper in the morning (if you're lucky enough to see your kids in the morning).  It doesn't mean watching sports and using your children as beer fetchers.  You're not clocking hours.  You're building relationship. My husband had a head start, he had (has) a Father who walked in the door from work and laid on the floor.  Literally.  He laid on the floor and his kids would jump on him, play with/around him, and inadvertently massage him until dinner.  My hubby does the same; except the kids know they're helping his back when he gets them to walk up it and jump off his shoulders.  

I am a strong woman.  I have a tendency to be a leader.  I, very intentionally, insist on my husband taking the reigns in our family.  We make decisions together, he delegates many things to me, but he is the head of the household.  Because he stays at home in his free time, brings children to the grocery store or library, or helps on laundry day has nothing to do with my personality, my "controlling" him or his position in the household.  He does these things because he loves us, with a fierce intensity, that I am thankful for absolutely every day.  What does he have to show for it?  A wife that would lay down her life for him, who can't wait to rip his clothes off when the kids are in bed (watching your hubby do dishes can do that to a Mommy), and who picks up his socks from the TOP of the laundry hamper and puts them in with 99% no complaining.   He has children who love and adore him, who beg for the next "boys night" and are excited when he's home from work.  Most importantly, he has a family he his HAPPY to come home to, and a truly rich life.

This post has been husband approved

Why you should "date" your children...

Yes.... date your children.

Stay at home, work outside the home - it goes for all parents, date your kids.  Here's my short list why:

For the last 2 years, this little man (5 years old) has insisted on looking like an actual little man.  He wants people to think he's a little person and not a child.  He insists on scarves, tying his hair into a ponytail and of course a moustache.  He usually wears a marker moustache, but I surprised him and splurged on a more realistic looking one.  It made his day.  If someone smiles at him as if he is a child, he slowly blinks and turns away - like a grown man would do to any nuisance.  It's so hard not to laugh but it's important to him and I can't get enough of it so I play along.  

1. They need YOU.  It can feel as though you're always staying ahead of the tornado, and any of the conversations you have with your little ones are while doing something else.  Face to face time, truly listening and making eye contact is hard to do throughout the day - that's why setting time apart is important.   I only get to do this once in a while, and each child in my house gets 3-4 "dates" a year - so this isn't something that can't be worked into a calendar.  Set the date, pick somewhere quiet outside of the home, turn off your phone, and let your kid absolutely have YOU.  No dishes to do, no siblings in the background fighting for attention, no phone calls, nothing to take your attention away from your "date".    

2. You're sowing seeds.  My oldest is only 12, so this next chunk of advice is purely from my own childhood and watching other families (succeed and fail).  Parents expect, and need, a relationship with their older children.  Parents who are trusted are more likely to be told about a school bully, sexual experimentation or abuse, drugs, etc - and parents with a healthy parent/child relationship will probably see these things before they're brought up.  This communication doesn't magically happen between two people, and it is especially not initiated by the child (now a tween/teen).  This is a cultivation of relationship -where the Mom who listened to ridiculous stories about superheroes and boogers, and then girls and things feeling "funny down there", is a trusted person to hear the big stuff like friends shoplifting and an inappropriate Uncle.  I know it's hard to look at a 3yr old and think - I'd better get this relationship headed in the right direction.  We are so busy making meals, running errands, wiping bums - but that 3 year old becomes a not-3-year-old so quickly and building the relationship becomes more difficult the longer you wait.  

3. Activities are not included.  Soccer practice, karate, dance, etc. are not one on one time with a parent.  Most families play this scene on their way to an activity.... hurry up and get out the door before I explode, don't talk I'm concentrating on speeding to whatever we're late for, and phew... go do whatever activity I'm paying a fortune for you to complain about attending.  There are variations as always, but most outings look that way for a lot of families (even really nice families that don't fight during this process but it's the same process nonetheless).  I'm not saying being involved in programs, sports, and leisure activities aren't important or good - I'm just saying it doesn't count.  

4. You'll love it.  Having more than one child means I can't lavish attention on everyone all the time.  I spend no time watching tv while they are awake, spend very little time on the computer or phone (no games) during the day (you have to watch yourself or it gets addictive), and use the majority of my time cleaning, prepping meals, teaching, playing, cleaning, breaking up fights, wiping bums, setting up crafts, cleaning, and - listening.    Even with all the time I allow for them, the time I carve out just isn't enough.  Some kids are more needy than others and want to talk to me all day long - explaining every thought in their head at great length, and some aren't.  They all need the same one on one time.  The point is, I hate feeling rushed - having to stop someone's story because another someone is crying, asking people to get out from under my feet so I can get dinner on the table,  hopelessly shushing everyone because someone was brave/dumb enough to call me.  I hate the feeling of not enough time as much as I love the feeling I get when I sit down with a child and say.... ok baby, talk my ear off. 

All my dates have been in coffee houses.  The kids order steamers - hot milk with a flavour shot that they think is awesome.  We scour the games bucket before we leave and fill my purse with their favourite games.  Checkers, cards, my last date asked me to bring the photo album of when he was a baby so we could look at it.  I know I said no activities, but having a game like tic tac toe can ease the child in to real conversation when needed.  It really is nice to spend time with the little person you are raising.  Our children are NOT accessories.  They don't fill a quota in our lives, they aren't meant to look cute and impress our friends with their hilarious antics (total bonus if that's what happens) - they are people who are learning how to behave, love and be in relationships - so enjoy your time with them while they adore you and are so willing to learn.  

*I've actually had to have a few dates in the house, turning it into a coffee shop.  If it's an older child's turn and my husband's work schedule is too hectic I let that child stay up late after the others are tucked in, and we replicate the coffee house at home*

5. Teaching moments.  The moment to teach someone how to behave is not when they are in trouble for behaving poorly - it's from watching you do it properly in everyday life.  Practice love and respect in the home every day, correcting small hiccups as they come along.  The dates top it off, teaching your little ones that you share time (not money and gifts) to show love.  It also builds up their self esteem and their expectations of relationships.  If you want your daughters to respect themselves and have a high standard when making friends or looking for a partner - be that example.  Date your daughter.  Show her that what she has to say is important and worth being listened to.  That she is smart, funny, capable, and worthy of friendship.  Date your sons.  Let them be goofy, and sensitive without the social pressures to be cool and tough.  Show them that real men are strong enough to support those around them with kindness, empathy and selflessness.  

The moustache man loves when I dress up for the date.  Normally I wouldn't wear my Downton Abbey hat out for coffee, but it makes him feel really important when I get dressed up and make an effort for our date.  

In conclusion: Most parents love their kids.  Most parents want their children to grow up to be people they can be proud of - smart, compassionate, functioning adults.  Whether or not you date your children, find the time to cultivate the good qualities you want to see in them.  Despite unprecedented access to information, entertainment and freedom - our young people still need us, desperately.  Make human connection the bulk of their lives, and let the other stuff be that - other stuff, not the focus. 

Hey, these are ACTUALLY good!

"Hey these are ACTUALLY good" Cookies

I love baking.  The only thing is, once something has been baked it inevitably gets eaten.  When I'm making pretzels, cookies and buns this can be a bad thing.  I want to be healthy and more importantly I want my kids to be healthy.  We limit our treats to Fridays, but throughout the rest of the week I get the urge to get creative in the kitchen and turn the oven on.  

You'll need a food processor or amazing blender to whip these up.

Preheat oven to 350.

3-4 ripe bananas

1 small can black beans

1/4 cup unsweetened Dutch cocoa

Add first three ingredients to food processor, and blend thoroughly.  It will be quite runny, goopy looking.  

If you want to add a bit of sweetness, this is the time to do it.  If I have unsweetened applesauce I add about 1cup at this time (I didn't have any this batch and they were fine).  You could also add 1/4 cup of Agave nectar or even maple syrup if you need to slowly adjust your tastebuds (or your kids tastebuds) to a different kind of sweet cookie.

1-2 cups of uncooked quick oats

Starting with 1/2 cup at a time, add oats to mixture and pulse.  You will decide when there are enough oats to hold a "cookie" shape on your baking sheet.  I used 2 cups for a thick dense cookie.  

Optional: 

1 cup chocolate chips, carob chips or raisins.

When I first started making these I always had to add a few chocolate chips to entice the kids to eat it.  Last night when I made them, my 5 year old came running in to the kitchen to remind me NOT to put chocolate chips in half the batch!  

Scoop out 2inch balls of dough with a large spoon and just plop (ewww, better word anyone?) them onto a parchment paper lined cookie sheet.  Bake for 10-12 minutes and enjoy at room temperature.

*If I have leftovers (I almost never do) I store them in the fridge.  If you choose to store them otherwise, simply place a clean dishtowel over them instead of plastic wrap as they are quite moist and you do not want them to mold* 

Enjoy!